Sunday, March 30, 2008

I'm not prophet, or a deep thinker. This is just how I see it.

Our bodies are only as old as our birthdays tell us. But our souls, our spirits, had to come from somewhere. We had a lot going on before we came down here to earth, and this is just a small part of what we're going to end up doing. But I want to talk about what happened before we came here. We all were together doing things and learning as a big family for a really long time. We had a father, who we now call God. I'm sure we had a mother. And we had older siblings, and younger siblings. But there were two brothers who were around first, and we loved them. The second oldest was Lucifer. He was amazing, and we looked up to him and he loved his younger siblings and taught us and helped us. And then there was Jehovah. He was the eldest, the first born, and we loved him too. He was amazing. He was kind, and wise, and we all wanted to be just like him someday. Jehovah and Lucifer were great friends as well as brothers, and they both loved helping their family, especially their younger siblings. Eventually, we were all ready for the next big part of our lives, our destinies. And our father took his eldest sons, our big brothers, and told them: "You two are my most trusted sons, the ioldest and wisest of my children. Our family is ready for a new chapter in life, and it's time for my children to move out and get ready to have their own families. But it's going to be hard, and they aren't going to remember this life they have now. So I want you two to come up with a way to help them, because I know you love them, and that you will be able to make sure they have what they need to succeed." So the two brothers went to brainstorm. And as brothers will, soon a small quarrel sprang up.
"Jehovah, I don't like this plan." Lucifer was a little confused. "It's pretty hard. Can't we make it any easier?" Jehovah smiled in that kind understanding, wise sort of way.
"Lucifer, we've got to trust our brothers and sisters. Mom and Dad have taught them a lot. This as much as we can do." Lucifer looked at his brother, and a thread of frustration started to weave itself into his heart.
"Jehovah, this plan makes it so they might not make it where they should be." Jehovah's smile didn't leave. "Jucifer, we have to give them choices. That's part of why they're going." new threads of anger wormed their way into the tapestry weaving in Lucifer's heart.
"Well I think we can make it easier." and with that, he left.

End part one

Thursday, March 27, 2008

A complimentary Rant

I'm annoyed. This isn't a poem, so if that's why you read my blog, you can skip this post, because it's a rant (I only say this because I like to pretend there's more than 5 people who know about my blog and more than one person who reads it regularly. If there does happen to be a ghost reader that I don't know about, it'd make my day if you'd give me a shout out...). Anyways, here's what's up. I'm am one of those chosen few people in this world who regularly gives out SINCERE compliments. If I like someone's hair, or clothes, or something they did, I actually tell them. Shocking, I know. But something has happened to our society when it comes to compliments, and it bugs the crap out of me. Nobody seems to be able to accept compliments, at least from me. It seems like whenever I tell someone I like their hair or their work, they have to tell me exactly why I'm wrong. I don't like being wrong, and in my eyes, I wasn't when i gave the compliment, and just because you told me how crappy the hair I thought looked nice is, doesn't mean I don't still think it looks nice, it just means that I'm kind of mad that you called me stupid. I'm not saying that EVERYONE reacts this way, but there seem to be more people who don't want to accept the compliment than people who do. Or, if they don't argue with me, they just say "thanks" in a confused, "how on earth could that guy be so blind as to think I looks nice today..." kind of way. And even if that's not what they intend, that's the message they send. For example, today I told a friend I thought she looked nice today. She wasn't dressed up, in fact she was wearing sweats and a T-shirt. But she looked nice. It's not like she looked like she'd just gotten out of bed, and i liked her hair. But of course, she had to point out the fact that she wasn't wearing fancy clothes and that she'd slept in this morning. So for future reference, if I give a compliment, that's exactly what i meant to give you. So take the warm fuzzy feeling of accomplishment or satisfaction that comes with it and enjoy it. And try to give your own SINCERE compliments more often. Maybe if it becomes a little more common, people as a whole will start believing that we actually mean the compliments we give again.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

Averted

I just wrote this. I think I'll read this one at the FLOBOTS concert instead of the other one. I like it better. Please, I still need feed back!

Averted
Can you see?
Did you see the bruises on the woman you passed in the store this morning, gifts from a boyfriend who knocks the life out of her piece by piece with every present he drops?
Can you see?
Did you see the t-shirt prophets, sermonizing on street corners, peddling their powdered salvations, surrounded the empty-shelled mannequins of their caged converts who sold their souls away by the hour?
Can you see?
Did you see the lost souls, the modern nomads whose minds have hidden until they can only rattle around in their skulls like the cans rattling in their bogarted carts?
Can you SEE?
Did you see those kids with their arms and thighs tattooed with permanent train tracks left by their short vacations into control and release, rides on the edge?
Can. you. see?
Did you see those children, with bodies wasting away from their hunger or food almost as much as their souls are wasting away from their hunger for one tiny whisper of affection?
CAN YOU SEE?
Can you see the shadows and ghosts of a consciously ignorant society, a world so eager to label away their problems, to file them into corners and closets, and then leave them, cheerfully choosing to forget, to whitewash over the mold and marks of desperation on the wall left by PEOPLE that were obliterated into echoes and smoke by those with the power to improve but averted their eyes because it was easier?
Can you see?
because let me tell you, as a whole country, as a whole world, we don’t.
We put up our rose colored windows and mask our shame behind what’s "in", and what’s "now". We infuse our ears with iPod anesthetic, hide behind tabloid tablets and pay-per-view pills from the helpless and hopeless, and deem them dirt on the soles of our designer shoes.
Let me tell you,
Averting our eyes doesn’t stop a tidal wave from crashing to shore.
and until we start seeing
we’re blind.
Here's the thing:
Until we start SEEING
we're blind.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

News

So the Matthew Shepard symposium is the week after next, and the FLOBOTS are coming down to perform at the university. For those of you who don't know who the FLOBOTS are, here's a link to their myspace page: http://www.myspace.com/flobots They do a lot of social injustice hip hop stuff, and they just got signed by a huge record label, so this could be one of their last performances not dominated by commerciality. Anyway, the high school is sending 3 kids to read an original poem about social injustice and that kind of stuff at the concert. And the the cathedral home is sending a person too. At least, that was the plan. But the cathedral home hasn't gotten back to the teacher in charge yet so she was looking around the student body for a fourth. I happened to have a poem that sort of fit the criteria, so i showed it to her and she picked me for the place filler. It's pretty awesome, but my poem definitely is not among my best work. So I'm going to improve it until I actually have to read it. it's posted on here, but I'm reposting it on this one, edited and improved. Any feedback and critique would be greatly appreciated. I hate the title, so any suggestions there would be great too. Thanks!

Ear Unplugs

Let thunder roar
let lightning flash
if you think you see
it's just the mask
don't get too close
you might get burned
just hide within
the lies you've learned
stay safe within illusion’s sphere
ignore the painful
truths you hear

we shelter in
the social norm
and mold ourselves
to popular form
we plug our ears
and hide our eyes
with wax made from
acceptable lies

though truth can hurt,
while it can scare
you know it's best,
though it can tear
to see the truth
within your soul
can shred your heart
or leave you whole

accept what's there
or make a change
it's up to you
how life's arranged
but only when
you know what's true
can you be free
to love what's you

so ditch the cowards
leave the mask
conforming throng
the hiding mass
rip out the ear plugs
and pull off the blinds
and you’ll be surprised
what you happen to find

though there might be pain
both in flesh and in heart
there’s the promise of better
just waiting to start
accept yourself
and be what's right
acceptance only in your sight
is something for which
all must fight

it's hard for anyone to be
the them they want the world to see
but if the masks and lies were gone
Maybe we could be free to see a new dawn

Thursday, March 06, 2008

OW!

I let go
finally able to unclench my fingers
out of the death grip with which I was
desperately clinging to that last,
impossibly thin thread
of hope.
and now I fall, fall, fall,
and I hurt so bad
that I don't even get to enjoy
the thrill and rush
I can't even notice the wind
whistling, screaming in my ears.
I hurt so bad that
when I hit the ground
and shattered, I barely noticed
because I was already
so broken when I let go.
What's a little more pain?
So here I am,
laying in a pile of debris,
a scattered collection
of shattered me.
hurting. a lot.
but at least now
I'm actually broken.
and since I'm finally broken
I can start putting my pieces
back together.
No more
waiting to be broken.
I'm there.
Thanks.